Marire de salariu
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9 Oct 2002, 15:460 0REQUEST FOR A RAISE
I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge head first into everything I do.
I do not get weekends off or public holidays.
I work in a dark, damp environment in high temperatures.
I don't get paid overtime.
Response
Dear Penis,
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your
request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
You'll retire well before reaching 65.
You're unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your allocated position before you've completed the day's work.
And, if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags.
Sincerely, The Management